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The Dead Man on William Randolph Hearst’s Yacht - Drunk History - YouTube
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- Hey, now,
my name is Lucius Dillon.
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Today we're gonna talk about
the mysterious death
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of Thomas Ince.
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Was he murdered?
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Or dead-ed.
Dead.
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- What?
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<i> - All right, so the year is
November of 1924.</i>
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<i> Thomas Ince was a big-deal
Hollywood producer.</i>
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<i> And big, old, huge
newspaper tycoon</i>
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<i> William Randolph Hearst wanted</i>
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<i> to get into the movie
industry.</i>
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<i> Hearst is like, hey,
it's your 44th birthday.</i>
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<i> Why don't you come to my yacht</i>
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<i> and we'll take a three-day
cruise.</i>
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<i> We'll get some celebrities.</i>
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<i> We'll sign some contracts to
make us business partners.</i>
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<i> It's gonna be a great, great,
great, great humdinger</i>
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<i> of a good time,</i>
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<i> so he was like, great.</i>
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<i> So they set out on the yacht.</i>
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<i> So it's Hearst and it's Ince</i>
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<i> and it's actress
Marion Davies.</i>
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She was Hearst's very
unsecretive mistress.
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- Ohh.
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<i> - And it's Charlie Chaplin,</i>
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<i> and it's also gossip columnist
Louella Parsons.</i>
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And other people not famous
enough
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to mention in this story.
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<i> So they all go out
for three days,</i>
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<i> but when the boat returns,</i>
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<i> Thomas Ince was dead.</i>
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<i> [gulps]</i>
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<i> Party over.</i>
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<i> The newspaper read "Big Hot
Shot Hollywood Producer</i>
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<i> Shot Dead On Hearst's Boat!"</i>
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But then,
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<i> the evening edition said,</i>
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<i> Ha Ha Ha! Whoops!
Just Kidding!</i>
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<i> He Actually Died Of Heart
Failure In Hearst's Home.</i>
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<i> [raspberries]</i>
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<i> So, yeah. Weird.</i>
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But things get more confusing,
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<i> because at Thomas' funeral,</i>
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<i> Ince's wife, Elinor,
was like,</i>
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<i> it's so terrible that
my husband has died.</i>
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<i> Okay, thanks.
Come again.</i>
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<i> And then she cremated him
immediately</i>
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<i> and [bleep] off to Europe.</i>
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<i> So that was kind of odd.</i>
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<i> We know he's dead.</i>
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That's the one fact
that we know.
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But since there was so many
different stories,
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I mean, it's pretty much like
the movie "Clue."
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<i> But we're gonna figure it out.</i>
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<i> We're gonna figure it out.</i>
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<i> So one of the theories
is that Thomas Ince</i>
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<i> had a problem with ulcers,</i>
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<i> because he was
a big Hollywood producer</i>
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<i> and had a lot of stress
and shit on his mind.</i>
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<i> Of course, when he gets
on the yacht,</i>
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<i> champagne's flowing.</i>
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<i> They were having hootenannies
and bee-baw-billies</i>
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<i> and blah-blah-blahs,</i>
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<i> and then Ince is like, oh.</i>
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<i> Salted almonds, yes.
I probably shouldn't.</i>
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<i> Okay, I'll have 1
or 40.</i>
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<i> And then of course when it
comes to toasting time,</i>
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<i> it was like, okay,
it's my [bleep] birthday.</i>
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<i> Toast to me.</i>
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Love--mm...
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<i> But because of that,</i>
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<i> it ruptured his ulcer,</i>
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<i> and the next morning, he wakes
up with a heart attack--</i>
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<i> not that cool--
and then died.</i>
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- That's theory one.
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<i> - That's theory one.</i>
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<i> So theory two is:</i>
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<i> they're having a great, old
time for three days.</i>
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<i> Except for Chaplin,
who was in his room,</i>
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<i> alone, suicidal.</i>
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<i> Because, like...
[sighs]</i>
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<i> I'm Chaplin.</i>
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<i> I'm a big, old genius.</i>
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<i> And I hate myself.</i>
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<i> Oh, look it here.</i>
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<i> There's a diamond-crusted
pistol.</i>
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<i> Ince comes in, is like,
hey, Chappy!</i>
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<i> What's going on?</i>
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<i> Look at you.
Are you being funny?</i>
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<i> No, I'm being depressed.</i>
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<i> Look--I mean, clearly I
have a pistol--oh, shit.</i>
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<i> I just shot you.</i>
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<i> Oh, God.</i>
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<i> Oh...God.</i>
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<i> Oh.</i>
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<i> Oh, okay. God.</i>
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<i> [belches]</i>
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Oh.
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<i> But here's the prevailing
theory:</i>
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<i> Hearst had a whole yacht
party.</i>
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<i> ♪ Dan-ding, bah-bah ♪</i>
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<i> ♪ Blee-blabbity, bloop-bloop ♪</i>
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♪ Bing-ding, bah-bah ♪
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<i> [raspberries]</i>
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<i> ♪ Bing-bong, boo-bah,
ooh, ooh ♪</i>
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<i> ♪ Dee-dee, dee-dil-ee-dee-dee,
boo, eh, mm-mm ♪</i>
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<i> [pops]</i>
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<i> [blubbers]</i>
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So that--so there's a lot of
music happening.
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- Why did you stop?
- [laughs]
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- [chuckles]
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<i> - And cut to Ince and Hearst
going down the hall.</i>
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<i> And Hearst is like,</i>
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<i> oh, I love Chaplin because
he does nice things</i>
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<i> to my bankroll.
I love Davies because</i>
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<i> she does nice things
to my downstairs.</i>
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<i> And then--oh!</i>
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<i> They see Chaplin and Davies
having some...</i>
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<i> - Sex.
- Yes.</i>
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So then back to Hearst had
a diamond-crusted pistol
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<i> and was like, how dare you,
Charlie Ma-Chaplin.</i>
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<i> Not Ma-Chaplin, but--
how dare you, Chaplin!</i>
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<i> I'm going to shoot you both.</i>
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So Ince did a slow motion
no...
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<i> He makes money for Hollywood.</i>
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<i> [raspberries]</i>
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<i> And someone got shot,
and it was Ince.</i>
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<i> And he died.</i>
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<i> But maybe not.</i>
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- [laughs]
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<i> - So after the incident,</i>
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<i> everyone was like,
so, Louella,</i>
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<i> you were on the yacht.</i>
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<i> What's the scoop?
Was it Hearst?</i>
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<i> Was it Chaplin?
Was it Davies?</i>
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<i> What happened?</i>
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<i> I saw nothing.
I was not on the yacht.</i>
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<i> I was 3,000 miles away.</i>
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<i> You didn't even know about it.</i>
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<i> [raspberries]</i>
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<i> She was there.
She didn't say anything.</i>
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- What do you believe happened?
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<i> - I think that Hearst
shot him</i>
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<i> on the yacht</i>
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<i> with the revolva--</i>
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revolver.
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<i> And he was buying up
everyone to shut them</i>
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<i> the [bleep] up.</i>
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<i> I mean, he bought this gossip
columnist.</i>
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<i> He bought Ince's wife.</i>
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<i> And he got away with it.</i>
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<i> Because Hearst owns
everything.</i>
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<i> He owns all of the newspapers.</i>
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<i> He is the Citizen Kane,</i>
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<i> the rosebud.</i>
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<i> And after all that,</i>
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<i> Hearst said like,
hey, everybody,</i>
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<i> Thomas Ince didn't die
of natural causes--</i>
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<i> wait, no, yeah--</i>
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he did die--
[laughs]
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<i> Thomas Ince did not die
of murder.</i>
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<i> He died of natural causes.</i>
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<i> Nice try.
[laughs]</i>
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<i> I'm Hearst.</i>
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<i> And I'm gonna go home
and sleep with my wife.</i>
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<i> Good night.</i>
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- [laughs]
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- Mm.
- Do you have
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any other
theories?
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No?
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