Strip Clubs Suck - YouTube

- Well guys I think we did it.

I think we planned the perfect bachelor party for Shane.

We've got booze, we've got drugs,

we got all the stuff that we know Shane loves

from years of being friends with him.

Is there anything I'm forgetting?

- Well, I mean, no one's said it yet.

Someone has to say it.

So how about a strip club.

Strip club.

Strip Club.

- Oh yeah, I'd love to go to a strip club.

- Oh yeah, strip club, we have to go,

and now that you said it

I'll be a killjoy if I shoot it down.

- I mean why would you shoot it down?

- I wouldn't.

- There's nothing I love more

than being around my buds when I'm horny.

- Oh yeah, nothing like a night on the town

with a bunch of sexually frustrated guys

with distractingly persistent boners.

- Bink, bink, bink.

- Are you saying you don't wanna go?

- I wouldn't say that because then you'd think

I'm less of a man.

- Well I guess it's settled, we're going.

- Oh yeah, we're definitely going

cause people expect us to, you know,

and that's a good enough reason to go I guess.

- And make sure you have plenty of cash

because if money isn't leaving you hands every two minutes

they'll think you're scum.

- Fine by me, I love spending money in small forgettable

but collectively significant amounts.

- Then you're gonna love those ATM fees.

- I can't wait.

And hey, if I get sick of it I'm sure it'll be easy

to get a large group of people to leave at the same time.

- Why would you wanna leave?

- Do you not wanna go?

- No I wanna go.

It's a strip club and it's a bachelor party and I'm a man.

- Yeah me too.

I'm also a man and I love lookin at those women.

- I bet you do.

- Yeah I love lookin at em and wondering

how their life led them here and whether they're happy.

- Nothing makes me wonder if I'm a good person

quite like making somebody get down on all fours

and sweep their earnings off

the dirtiest floor in the world.

- That's why I spend all my time trying

to convince them that I'm not a creep.

Even though.

- You don't care.

I like to push those thoughts deep deep down

until I don't even consider the strippers

as people anymore, you know, like a monster.

- Nice way to justify your presence there.

- I don't have to justify it.

I love going to strip clubs.

- I'd go right now but I need time to get drunk.

- Oh right because they don't serve alcohol

at a California strip club.

- Oh yeah a place where it's too loud

to have a conversation and all the normal social rules

have fallen away completely.

That sounds like a place where I wanna be sober.

- You'll be glad you are when you're trying

to figure out how much a lap dance costs

while it's happening.

- Talk about a perfect combination, sex and math.

- Sex and math.

- And don't forget about the angry bouncer

who will be watching you the whole time.

- Hey, no touching.

- That doesn't make me uncomfortable.

The only people who will be uncomfortable

with this situation because I won't be

and the bouncer won't be, the strippers won't be,

will be our wives and girlfriends.

- The people we care the most about.

- Man, tell me about it, cause it's gonna be like,

hey calm down, we have to go, it's a bachelor party.

- We have to go.

- No we want to go.

- We have to go but we wanna go.

- Have to go want to go.

- We could spend all that time and money

like going out and exploring parts of the city

that we've never been to before

and buying all the expensive drinks

that we don't normally buy because it's not

a special occasion but this time it is

and gambling and playing games, cracking jokes,

til the sun comes up.

But we have to go to a strip club.

- Right.

We have to.

- We want to cause it's a bachelor party.

- Right, you gotta go to a strip club on a bachelor party.

- We have to and we want to.

- Oh we definitely want to.

- Yay.

- Hi it's Mike Trapp from College Humor.

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