Wells Fargo Wagon - SNL - YouTube

>>> YOU'RE WATCHING "THE MUSIC MAN" ON

TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES. SO YOU'RE EITHER AN OLD WOMAN OR

A YOUNG GAY MAN. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]

♪♪♪ >> MASON!

MASON! >> WHY, HELLO THERE, WINTHROP.

>> WHEN DO YOU THINK US KIDS ARE GOING TO RECEIVE OUR SPECIAL

MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS? >> WELL, I GUESS WINTHROP'S

STILL WORKING ON THAT LIST. >> SAY IT TO MY FACE, BITH!

[ LAUGHTER ] >> WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WOAH!

OKAY, EASY, WINTHROP. I THINK EVERYONE'S JUST A LITTLE

EXCITED ABOUT THESE INSTRUMENTS. [ DINGING ]

>> OH, AND LISTEN! THAT COULD BE THEM ARRIVING

RIGHT NOW. ♪ OH THE WELLS FARGO WAGON

IS COMING DOWN THE STREET PLEASE LET IT BE FOR ME ♪

♪ OH THE WELLS FARGO WAGON IS COMING DOWN THE STREET

I WISH I WISH I KNEW WHAT IT COULD BE ♪

♪ I GOT A BOX OF MAPLE SUGAR ON MY BIRTHDAY

IN MARCH I GOT A GREY MACKINAW ♪

♪ AND ONCE I GOT A GRAPEFRUIT FROM TAMPA ♪

♪ MONTGOMERY WARD SENT ME A BATHTUB AND A

CROSS-CUT SAW ♪ ♪ OH-HO THE WELLS FARGO

WAGON IS COMING DOWN THE STREET ♪

♪ OH PLEASE LET IT BE FOR ME ♪

♪ IT COULD BE SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE WHO IS NO RELATION ♪

♪ OR IT COULD BE SOMETHING VERY VERY SPECIAL NOW

JUST FOR ME ♪ [ DINGING ]

>> OOH. >> OOH.

>> WELL, HELLO, RIVER CITY! >> OUR INSTRUMENTS!

>> DO YOU HAVE MY CLARINET? >> YEAH, WHAT ABOUT MY FLUTE OR

WHATEVER? >> WELLS FARGO'S GOT SOMETHING

EVEN BETTER THAN INSTRUMENTS. THEY'RE CALLED BANK ACCOUNTS!

[ LAUGHTER ] AND I'M GIVING EVERYONE AT LEAST

THREE OF THEM! >> YEAH!

WAIT, WHAT? >> THAT'S RIGHT.

EVERYONE GETS A BANK ACCOUNT. LIKE WHAT'S YOUR NAME, SON?

>> WINTHROP. >> OKAY, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

[ LAUGHTER ] >> SALLY!

>> THAT'S ONE ACCOUNT FOR YOU, SALLY, AND FOR YOUR DOG.

>> SIR, I DON'T THINK THESE CHILDREN OR THEIR DOGS NEED BANK

ACCOUNTS. >> OH, SURE THEY DO.

IN FACT, THIS WHOLE TOWN NEEDS BANK ACCOUNTS, LIKE YOU, SIR AND

YOU, MA'AM, AND THIS SKINNY GENTLEMAN OVER HERE.

>> THAT'S A MAIL BOX. [ LAUGHTER ]

>> WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS, SIR? >> YOU KNOW WHAT A QUOTA IS,

KID? A QUOTA IS A TARGET I NEED TO

HIT OR I'M A DEAD MAN. SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY?

DO YOU WANT TO KILL ME? OR DO YOU WANT TO SHUT AND UP

GET A CREDIT CARD? >> BUT SIR, YOU'RE SWINDLING

CUSTOMERS, ISN'T THAT FRAUD? >> IS IT A FROG?

NO, IT'S A CREDIT CARD. >> I SAID FRAUD, I THINK YOU

HEARD ME SAY "FRAUD." >> EVERYONE HATES THIS KID,

RIGHT? [ LAUGHTER ]

>> WELL, I THINK THE BOY'S RIGHT.

>> YES, IF WELLS FARGO KEEPS DOING THIS, THEY'RE GOING TO GET

INTO TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE TROUBLE.

>> SHUT THE HELL UP! [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THE PRESSURE I'M UNDER!

THESE WELLS FARGO GUYS ARE JACKALS.

AS A MATTER OF FACT -- THEY TOOK MY DAUGHTER.

>> NO THEY DIDN'T. >> OKAY.

YOU GOT ME. SALES TECHNIQUE.

BUT COME ON, YOU'VE GOT TO HELP ME OUT ON THIS.

IF I HAVE TO FACE MY BOSS TOMORROW WITH NOTHING, I'LL

SHIPOOPI IN MY PANTS. ♪♪♪

>> HEY, MISTER. I'LL TAKE ONE BANK ACCOUNT,

PLEASE. >> WOW.

I WAS ALL WRONG ABOUT YOU, KID. YOU'RE A REAL PAL.

THAT'S WHY I'M ALSO GOING TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING CALLED AN

EXPLODING MORTGAGE. THAT SOUNDS PRETTY COOL, HUH?

>> SURE DOES! >> YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN HOW TO

TALK, MAN. I'M, LIKE, DRENCHED.

♪♪♪ ♪ IT COULD BE SOMETHING FOR

SOMEONE WHO IS NO RELATION ♪ ♪ OR IT COULD BE

YES IT COULD BE YES YOU'RE RIGHT

IT SURELY COULD BE ♪ >> OH, ON THE WAY IN I RAN OVER

THREE KIDS. ♪ JUST FOR ME ♪

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> WELLS FARGO!

SOWWY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]