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Secession vs. a Two-State Solution in California | The Daily Show - YouTube
Channel: The Daily Show with Trevor Noah
[0]
The presidency of Donald Trump
[1]
has pitted liberals
and conservatives
[3]
against each other
with protests, marches
[7]
and scathing
fourth grade art projects.
[9]
But in California, liberal
activist Marcus Ruiz Evans
[13]
has a bold, new idea
for relieving the tension.
[16]
California could simply leave
America and become a nation.
[19]
California's
supposed to be chill,
[21]
but this doesn't sound
very chill.
[23]
This maverick wants California
to divorce the United States,
[27]
and he's aiming
to put California secession
[30]
on November's ballot.
[31]
Marcus and his organization
called Yes California
[34]
say their state
has a unique identity
[37]
that's separate from America.
[40]
You have two cultures
that are vastly different
[42]
with California values
versus American values.
[44]
KOSTA: But what were
these vast differences?
[46]
California's the place
that welcomes immigrants.
[50]
So do you have a big statue up
that says,
[52]
"Bring me your poor,
your tired, your weak"?
[53]
Uh, we have
the Golden Gate Bridge.
[55]
So California's
Statue of Liberty
[57]
is just longer,
you can drive on it,
[59]
and people also commit suicide
off it quite frequently.
[62]
So what else you got?
[63]
The idea of national parks.
We invented that.
[65]
-Yeah?
-The idea of clean air.
[67]
-Those sort of big ideas.
-So you want to create a country
[70]
that believes in big ideas
[71]
-Yes. -and wants
to welcome immigrants.
[73]
-Yes. -It sounds to me like
you're stealing
[75]
-America's ideas.
-We are.
[77]
KOSTA:
Original idea or not,
[79]
this bear fondler has collected
thousands of signatures
[82]
supporting his plan.
[84]
But Northern California
radio host
[86]
and computer hoarder
Paul Preston
[88]
thinks Yes California
is a bad idea.
[91]
Well, Yes California
is not gonna work.
[93]
Californians are all Americans
and Americans first.
[97]
KOSTA:
Finally, a reasonable person.
[99]
And Paul has a simple plan
[101]
to fix
all this California conflict.
[103]
We're creating New California.
[105]
And what is New California?
[106]
Well, we want to take California
and split it into two states.
[110]
I mean, hey, it worked
for Israel and Palestine.
[112]
-Right? Come on.
-That's right.
[114]
KOSTA: So instead of losing
one California,
[116]
we gain two Californias.
[118]
And surprise, surprise,
Paul claims his California
[122]
has its own unique identity.
[124]
When I think of California,
I think of Botox,
[126]
crystals,
milk that comes from nuts.
[129]
What am I missing?
[130]
California, at its core,
is a conservative state,
[133]
but those people
have been suppressed.
[136]
KOSTA: Although eight million
Californians voted for Hillary,
[138]
four million voted for Trump.
[140]
So for them, Paul gerrymandered
[142]
a second,
conservative California,
[145]
one without Hollywood,
Silicon Valley or Wine Country?
[149]
This is the fun California,
and this is the shit California.
[153]
Why do you want
the shit California?
[155]
We believe that that's
the best part of California.
[157]
It's based on ruralness.
[159]
It's got to feel nice
once you separate
[161]
to be free from all
that excessive tax revenue
[164]
over there in Silicon Valley
and Los Angeles County.
[167]
Well, we'll have
San Diego County.
[169]
So San Diego--
[171]
is that 'cause you want to keep
the Chargers or...?
[173]
-They're gone. -You don't even
have the fucking Chargers?
[176]
But there's one person
who doesn't like
[178]
this two-state solution.
[179]
We're gonna campaign
for every county in California
[182]
to stay part of California.
[183]
What do you say
to all those Californians
[185]
that voted for Trump?
[187]
You're welcome to leave
if you don't like it.
[188]
-That's what Americans believe.
-Uh...
[190]
If you don't want to be
in America, then get out.
[192]
-Well...
-You stole that, too.
[193]
Wow, liberals and conservatives
in this state
[195]
really are at odds.
[197]
But how bad can it be?
[198]
My biggest fear is
a lot of people are gonna die,
[200]
-which is what happened
in the Civil War. -(exhales)
[204]
KOSTA:
Now we're talking civil war?
[206]
That's not California.
Californians are hippies.
[208]
Will it be hard
to fight a civil war
[210]
if you don't eat protein
or believe in guns?
[213]
New California will bomb
the shit out of you guys.
[215]
-Uh, they won't.
-KOSTA: Uh, they will,
[217]
and this civil war
has more than two sides.
[220]
In the course
of shooting this piece,
[222]
novelty tie enthusiast
Tim Draper
[224]
has introduced
a third initiative:
[226]
to split California
into three states.
[229]
We're trying to create states
for the next millennial.
[232]
KOSTA: And guess who doesn't
like the idea of a three-way,
[236]
besides my girlfriend?
[237]
It's better for California
if California sticks together.
[240]
We shouldn't let our differences
tear California apart.
[243]
We should let your differences
tear America apart.
[246]
I-I... That's a tough one.
[248]
KOSTA:
But which out of the box plan
[250]
did Californians actually want?
[252]
I headed for Venice Beach
to find out.
[255]
-I don't think they should be
their own country. -Why? Why?
[256]
I think that's pretty stupid.
[258]
KOSTA: Okay, they don't like
the liberal plan,
[260]
so they must be conservative.
[261]
What do you see here?
Do you see a Muslim man
[263]
who's trying to take
an American job?
[265]
-He's a comedian.
-But he's a Muslim comedian.
[267]
I mean, how come
he gets all the best segments?
[268]
-You know?
-'Cause he's funny.
[270]
You know what,
we're gonna edit that.
[271]
These liberals
are so impossible.
[273]
Maybe we should
split up the state.
[275]
If you're a liberal,
stay on the blue side.
[277]
If you're a conservative,
stay on the right side, please.
[279]
Okay?
[281]
Make America Great Again, buddy.
[283]
This is where you put Korea,
isn't it?
[284]
South Korea, North Korea.
[286]
(speaking foreign language)
[288]
Oh, no!
[290]
KOSTA: Seems like the only thing
Californians can agree on
[293]
is how stupid
all of these plans are.
[295]
Oh, and legalizing weed.
[297]
I got two hours
before the flight,
[299]
so let me go investigate
that story.
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