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"I once spent an entire Christmas locked in a bank" - Would I Lie to You? [HD][CC] - YouTube
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I once spent an entire Christmas locked in a bank.
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David's team.
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By an entire Christmas, what are we talking? All 12 days, I'm assuming.
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No, Christmas Eve until about 7.00 on Boxing night.
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- On Boxing night?
- Yes.
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When the bank opened for the usual Boxing Day evening.
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- No, somebody came to let me out.
- Which bank?
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It was a merchant bank. I was working as a security guard
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and I'd elected, due to personal trauma, that I'd spend my
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Christmas working overtime, guarding Hill Samuel in Victoria.
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And then they forgot about you.
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No, because there was a rush on at Christmas,
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I never got relieved on Christmas morning.
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- A rush on.
- Oh, we all look forward to that.
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I mean, in the Brydon household, I have to say,
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it's my one Christmas treat.
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It was the Christmas after John Lennon got assassinated.
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And you had to go into hiding?
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I don't ever remember you being implicated in this.
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- You see, I was living with a girl in Streatham.
- Yeah, Yoko.
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No. And we split up because she was seeing somebody else.
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John Lennon.
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So I needed to get a job and, you know, I wanted to be a bit of
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a martyr so I said I'd work the Christmas shift as a security guard.
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Like many of the great martyrs through history.
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- Dave, answer me this.
- Yes, certainly, Griff.
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You went through a period where you were so lonely and down
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that you didn't have any family of any kind whatsoever
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who were saying, come home for Christmas and come and...?
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No, but they laughed themselves silly when I phoned them
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up on Christmas Day and told them where I was.
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How did you do that?
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There was a phone in the bank.
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What sort of bank is this, with a phone in it?
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I, honestly, I've tried to phone a bank over and over again.
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So there's a phone in the bank,
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why did you only use it to phone your family
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and not to phone someone who could have released you from the bank?
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Oh, I kept phoning. I kept phoning. It was a firm in Croydon that
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had employed me and I kept phoning them and they said
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they had nobody in to hold on.
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So I held on right through, like, four shifts.
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- And you accepted that?
- Oh, no, I was locked in the bank.
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- So at 8.00...
- And I couldn't get out.
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When you're a guard in the bank, they lock you in.
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They don't lock you in surely, in the bank?
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Well, they wouldn't give me the keys. I was only 22.
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Sorry, that's how a merchant bank ensures its security over Christmas?
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It locks a 22-year-old in there and they go,
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it's all right if anyone breaks in, the 22-year-old will handle it.
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No, but I had a phone, you see. I could have phoned for the police.
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What were you supposed to do if the burglars all come in?
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Ring Croydon, they say, we'll have someone there in the next 36 hours.
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How did you actually celebrate Christmas?
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I mean, what did you do to mark it?
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Before I went to work, I did take myself a small capon,
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I stuffed it, little sausages and everything and I put it by my,
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you know, away, and I looked forward to it.
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But when I got back on Boxing night,
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the cat had had my capon cos I forgot to put it away.
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The cat was wearing your cape?
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No, a capon, it's like a type of chicken.
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- Oh, sorry.
- I didn't even have a Christmas dinner.
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- The cat with a cape on.
- The cat wasn't wearing the apron.
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- He said...
- The cat's there taking over doing the frying going,
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well, he's gone I might as well look after myself.
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- No, no, no, no, no.
- It's like a big chicken.
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He clearly said, I came back and the cat had my cape on.
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So, David, what are you thinking?
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There is only one person who can answer this question
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here in this room, so we're going to have to turn to you, Jimmy.
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I wouldn't have thought there were many merchant banks in Victoria.
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I don't really know much about banks in Victoria,
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if it was in Jersey I'd...
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LAUGHTER
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..I'm your man.
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So is it the truth?
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- I think true.
- Do you?
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I like the detail, the cat,
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the capon, I love the story, I'd like to buy the rights.
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- We think it's true.
- True, we think it's true.
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- You all think it's true.
- Absolutely true.
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Dave, truth or lie?
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Sadly, it's true.
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Yes, it's true.
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