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How I became legally German without speaking German - YouTube
Channel: Spaghetti Road
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so this is the story of how i became a
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german citizen
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without ever having lived in germany or
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be able to speak the language
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if you enjoyed this video please
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consider subscribing to the channel
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a lot have asked me where i'm from and i
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feel like i finally need to come clean
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about this
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after the flag videos a lot of people
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have sent me their flags and proudly let
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me know about their countries
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it's awesome how nice people all over
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the world are but some germans also
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happily began sending me local flags
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with descriptions of the country
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thinking they were teaching a foreigner
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about them
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for example last kindly sent the flag of
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the german city of cookshaven
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reiner just wanted to share some german
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culture with these german-colored socks
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and it makes me feel like a liar a
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complete phony
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because actually i'm just one of you
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i'm legally german one morning when
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eating my gummy bears with sauerkraut
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and vice beer i decided i finally need
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to explain why
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so let's go a bit back i grew up as a
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danish boy
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in denmark speaking danish i never lived
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in germany but i did of course visit a
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couple of times
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for example when going camping in france
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with my family we drove through germany
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or when going skiing in austria germany
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was quite convenient to drive through
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or when i visited the czech republic i
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drove through germany
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apart from danish i was taught english
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in school which was cool because i
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became able to understand what they were
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saying in movies songs and video games
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later when i was 13 to 15 years old
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german was also introduced in school
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it seemed less useful compared to
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english and i
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hated it instead of just one word for
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there german had for no reason made
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three different words for it
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the id does just to be sure you were
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wrong 67
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of the time if that wasn't bad enough
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just to be sure you were wrong virtually
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all the time
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these words were again split into a
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million other words just to make it even
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harder
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and if my old german teacher is watching
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this really no offense to her
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she actually cared a lot and really
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tried making me learn but
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at this point i already felt so deeply
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violated and being forced to learn this
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crazy mess of a language that i didn't
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pay any attention at all
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as soon as it became possible i switched
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to spanish instead of course
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and thought this would be my last
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encounter with german
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in june 2014 i visited a campsite in
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croatia with my family
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there were a lot of germans there and
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they seemed to share community
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this was during the world cup and as
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germany kept winning matches the german
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team kept getting more and more
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attention
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the games were shown at most restaurants
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and were loudly cheered on
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specifically there were always two drunk
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german guys my age who were obnoxious
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and loud
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i must admit i hope brazil would beat
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germany in the semi-finals
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since i didn't like these two particular
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guys i had no real connection to brazil
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i was simply just a hater because of two
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random guys
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anyway as many probably know i better
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the wrong horse brazil didn't win
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germany did 7 1 so decisively that a few
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certain websites
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actually had to request people to stop
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uploading match under public humiliation
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that night there was an incredible
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atmosphere where all the germans were
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and i could only look with envious eyes
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at them
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a couple of years later when planning to
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china road trip we were applying for
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visas
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i noticed kazakhstan and mongolia
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required me as a danish citizen to
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obtain visas in advance
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whereas the germans could just come and
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go as they wanted
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i was truly jealous of these pesky
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germans with all their travel freedom
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and victories in football
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but if you can't beat them join them how
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hard would it be to become german
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i had some family from there which might
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help my case but would i have to move to
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germany
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would i have to pass some sort of test
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were there any chances at all
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well the road trip was in a few days at
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this point not enough time to become
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german so i sort of just
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forgot and a year passed but then i
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remembered the idea
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before proceeding i had to know if
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germany had any mandatory military
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service
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a lot of countries still have it and
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this project would be beyond stupid if i
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were to end up enrolled in the military
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and have to go fight somewhere for
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germany
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as it doesn't always end well luckily
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germany already abolished conscription
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next step was figuring out how to
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actually become legally german
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turns out there's quite a lot of things
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needed living there for eight years
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where my longest year once in germany
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have been 3 weeks
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so if the government was willing to
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accept that i just need
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7 years 11 months and a week extra
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commitment to the free and democratic
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constitutional system
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i guess i'm cool with that possesses an
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adequate knowledge of the german
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language
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i don't know if my years of not paying
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attention in german class would help me
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here
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have legal capacity or legal
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representative
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i don't even know what that means so i'm
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probably good there
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and even an examination altogether it
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seemed impossible
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the other options also didn't seem
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applicable to me i wasn't born there
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and i couldn't really claim to be a
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victim of nazi persecution
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but how about by descent turns out if
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there's just a straight line of
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germanness
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and nobody in the family has renounced
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it you might be german as well
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there are of course some exceptions such
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as before 1975
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apparently you could only inherit
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citizenship from your father
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but after that year german mothers were
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also considered as german as german
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fathers
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i went to the german embassy just to be
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sure and to figure it all out
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i told them about my family and the
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helpful bureaucrats set my case was very
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easy
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there was no need for a lengthy process
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i would just need to write a few
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documents
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and then i could apply for german
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passport straight away from the german
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government's perspective
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i had always been german since birth i
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had just gone under the radar and never
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been registered
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well walking from the embassy was a
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pretty weird feeling
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there was no sneakiness or anything
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seemingly i was just german all of a
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sudden
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though i didn't have a passport yet i
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decided to take my germanness very
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seriously
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i went to the supermarket and bought all
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the sauerkraut and
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though i'm really not into the musical
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style of ramstein i forced myself to
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listen to 15 minutes every day
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since it seemed pretty german i still
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didn't speak german but that would
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probably come along with the passport
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i booked an appointment at the embassy
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so-called burger service
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and i must admit i was quite
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disappointed it was not what the name
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suggested
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anyway i applied for my passport and
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waited a few weeks where i only watched
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movies dubbed in german
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before i went back to the embassy to get
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my passport my first joke at the embassy
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as soon as i got in my hand was if i was
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now entitled to any money or payments
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from the german government
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it was unfortunately not appreciated on
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my way home
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now as an official german i had so many
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questions who was the german version of
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shakira
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should i like swiss people i quickly
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began feeling very german
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i had a sudden and unexplained urge to
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be very punctual and less funny
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and a strong desire to open europe's
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borders and have a more integrated
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european union
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before i had never really liked
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sauerkraut i actually found it a bit
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off-putting but now i had a hunger
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specifically for it
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i invited a couple of friends got a few
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flags and balloons and held a german
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dinner party on my first night as the
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documented german
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the menu was venus needs with sauerkraut
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though the name suggests it might have
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been more austrian actually
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i noticed that i still wasn't able to
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speak german or like sauerkraut but that
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would probably come any day now
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i must say it was a nice feeling to know
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i could move to germany and
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immediately be entitled to voting rights
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and helped to choose the future of the
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country
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a few days later i was actually so lucky
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that i had leo and frankfurt airport for
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a couple of hours
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where i found an appropriate german
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outfit for the occasion of being in
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germany for the first time as an
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official german
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though the shanking area is practical
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without border checks on this day as i
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walked through the airport i wanted to
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show my passport
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so instead i showed it to every person i
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interacted with whether they wanted to
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see it or not
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i humbly exclaimed i was german but it
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was not such an impressive thing in
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germany since
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apparently a lot of people are german
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there not a lot changed after i became
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german
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sure my roommates began finding a lot of
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sauerkraut in weird places all over the
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apartment but
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mostly life was pretty normal i
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appreciated the passport as a symbol of
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being german
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and i would keep it forever though i did
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lose it a couple of months later
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as thing unfortunately goes i was taking
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a bus in honduras when five armed
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robbers entered and stole everything
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to be honest in this situation having
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two passports were incredibly helpful
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since i could travel onward with my
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danish passport i had kept hidden in my
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shoe without being stuck
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just a quick heads up if you now meet
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somebody with my name
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and a german passport in honduras it's
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probably identity theft so don't trust
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them
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when i got back i was once again just
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danish a new passport would cost me 58
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euros and 50 cents
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a significant sum but then again i had
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already had a taste of the joy of being
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german so i decided to get a new one
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a few months later there was an official
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soccer match between denmark and germany
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i took this as the real test of which
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country i should belong to
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i went to see it with my friend mass and
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though we represented opposing countries
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all of a sudden
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we tried to remain friends before the
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game i even practiced the german
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national anthem at home so i'd be able
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to sing it along
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at 18 minutes in denmark actually got
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the first goal
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so i took off the stupid german jersey
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and immediately began rooting for
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denmark instead
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but then germany also got a gold and i
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was back on their side
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in the end it ended 1-1 so i kept both
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countries with me
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i must admit when people ask me what i
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was i would still say danish
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as i felt like a bit of a faker when it
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came to being german at one point i
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traveled to beirut in lebanon
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and while getting a haircut at this
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guy's shop he asked me where i was from
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and i did finally answer i'm german well
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they had fled from syria and his brother
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had fled to germany instead
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and already learned the language so he
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insisted on immediately calling his
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brother on facetime in germany so i
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could speak with him
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as i still couldn't speak german i was
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very nervous about being busted but the
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brother was actually very nice and
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thought it was pretty funny in the end i
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began planning a bigger german party for
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my one year anniversary of getting my
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first passport
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my germanversary i went online to buy
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some decorations for the party
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first a big german flag but then i would
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have to decide whether to get the flag
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with the eagle or not so
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i got both and why not get 40 extra big
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flags just in case
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and a pile of flax and sticks is
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necessary too
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i also found a lot of must-haves such as
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german glasses
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this stuff to paint german flags in your
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face and these things
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and of course also 99 balloons i bought
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some german beer and some more
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sauerkraut so i'd be able to provide at
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least a kilogram per guest
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i decided to get 100 pictures printed of
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the famous german people but i didn't
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really know anyone else than miracle so
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i just got a hundred of her honestly i
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might have spent a bit too much in this
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party but it was all worth it
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i prepared an amazing playlist with the
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best hits of nina
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cuffberg and henty hincessare yeah i
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have since heard he's austrian and he
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has of course been replaced now on my
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playlist by helena fisher
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anyway i ordered the flags when in
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advance but a few days before the party
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they had still not arrived
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i was really worried they wouldn't get
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here in time so i went out and bought
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some discarded sewing fabric and turned
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my grandparents house into a small flag
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factory where i shoot them myself with
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the tina
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a great test of a girlfriend is if she
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is willing to spend all night helping
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you suit german flags
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10 out of 10 for patina in this case the
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flags i ordered didn't arrive but i'm
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still very happy with how the party
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turned out
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and two weeks after the party the flags
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did actually arrive
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when i would travel i'd mostly just use
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my german passport which resulted in a
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couple of people giving me compliments
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of how good my danish was
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instead of correcting anybody and saying
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it was my first language i just took the
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compliments and said thank you
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around christmas time i took a ferry to
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rostock to see a christmas market
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my plan was to show bethina my homeland
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and share my culture with her
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we had some glue wine wood fire and just
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walked around seeing the market for an
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afternoon
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don't worry being german didn't make me
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forget who i was when traveling to hong
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kong with patina there was a special
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queue where i could skip the line from
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creation by just being german
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of course i considered it but i decided
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staying with and keeping my girlfriend
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was much more important than saving 25
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minutes
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when showing my passport some people
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often hit me with some german
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so i always give a polite couldn't talk
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back
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one girl i met in egypt kept asking me
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how to say stuff in german
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and after i count this time said i don't
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know and she didn't believe me
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i gave up and i'm really not proud about
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this but i made up a couple of words
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such as kishnak
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to mean talking so to my fellow germans
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if you meet this egyptian girl please
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pretend the word she's using are real
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i continued the tradition of throwing
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german anniversaries and with all the
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flags that didn't arrive in time for the
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last one i now had a lot
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and i bought some more flags and some
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extra balloons
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i by the way thought uganda's flag fit
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way too well to not include it
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for this party i invited about 60 people
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to my apartment
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it was fun we had a quiz about the
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world's countries with questions such as
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which country won the most winter
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olympic medals who's the largest right
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producer or government with the highest
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budget surplus
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spiller germany was the right answer to
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every single question
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my guests seemed very impressed by my
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efforts i had met a couple of german
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people here in copenhagen who i've
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caused also invited
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they were the only ones who did not want
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to paint their faces with german flags
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and were a bit more reluctant regarding
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my blatant display of nationalism
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turns out the germans have a bit of a
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strained relationship with their flag
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and are not exactly comfortable with
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having it all over the place
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it was an important lesson i realized
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i'd been completely wrong
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being german was not about having the
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most flags it was just about being
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punctual
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and driving fast on the autobahn to be
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clear the next anniversary was
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celebrated without any flags
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this was also during the pandemic by the
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way so i just sat alone and it's our
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card
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another thing i learned from the real
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germans and this sounds like a dumb joke
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but they told me i was not supposed to
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eat the sauerkraut cold
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nobody had ever told me it should be
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heated it made it
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slightly better during this time i
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actually got a bit more comfortable with
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the german language
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i would say sentences such as we feel
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kostas and halbers kilokatoflan
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after all danish is not too far from
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german for example we even share the
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word for dark
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my big achievement was when i was
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finally able to read some of the
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literature
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sure i don't understand the most
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complicated stuff yet such as gerder or
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nietzsche in german but i'm able to read
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some of the other great german poetry
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such as this famous poem here he's
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saying he is uh snobby
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the small crocodile he is um
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from egypt on denial first he was in an
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egg but then he snapped himself free
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and i don't think this part is real
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words
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i also know how good of a german i had
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become when i was able to correctly
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identify 13 out of 16 bundeslander in
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this online quiz
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this summer i decided as a german it was
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important that i had seen the parliament
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of my country the so-called bundestag
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so i traveled back to berlin which was a
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lot of fun
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this guy gave a tour i saw the former
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division between east and west berlin
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and i had my first curry wurst in the
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next world cup france won
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so i briefly looked up french
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nationality law but decided even i have
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my limits
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germany was kicked out early in the
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group stage where i lost to south korea
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and danish citizens were giving the same
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visa freedom so all the initial benefits
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were gone
[908]
but i was still happy about being german
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though this stuff with nationality was
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pretty easy in my case it is of course
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not always like that
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there was a big contrast in having
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people in my life that were born here in
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denmark spoke danish as their first
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language
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were mostly unable to travel and still
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had decades-long struggle of getting a
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danish citizenship
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so all jokes aside i am really grateful
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for it
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i guess the last thing to do now that
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i'm publicly german
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is to go and update my profile picture
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to a german flag
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by the way my instagram is
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spaghettiroadofficial if you want to
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follow me
[939]
thank you very much for watching no no
[942]
sephie lindanke for sue xiao if you want
[946]
to support the channel feel free to
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subscribe
[948]
as a german i'll of course run this
[950]
channel in the future without humor or
[952]
jokes anymore
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you can also grab a shirt at
[954]
spaghettiroad.com our design with the
[956]
german flag is already available
[958]
and i was actually going to wear it
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myself but per suggestion from a german
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friend it would be a much more german
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design without the german flag
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so instead i have added the eu flag
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which i'll be able to wear without
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looking like a crazy nationalist
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a big thank you to all my patreons
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listed here on screen
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your support helps fund this channel and
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is greatly appreciated
[977]
all the best thank you
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[Music]
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you
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