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How Much Debt is Plankton In? 馃捀 Inside Bikini Bottom Episode 2 | SpongeBob SquarePants - YouTube
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[0]
Who is this Mr. Plankton?
[1]
Just how much debt
is Sheldon Plankton in?
[4]
As the owner of a failing business,
Plankton seems to have no restraint
[8]
when it comes to paying
for elaborate schemes, disguises,
[11]
and countless other expenses.
[13]
So we hired a certified financial advisor
to calculate his exact debt,
[17]
and lend her expertise
to help him out of it.
[19]
I assure you Mr. Plankton
will be in good hands with me.
[22]
I've seen hundreds of cases
of extreme debt,
[25]
and there's not one
I haven't been able to help with yet.
[27]
First, we had to determine
Plankton's income
[30]
and then subtract his various expenses
to see just how far in the red he is.
[34]
Question one, how much does
the Chum Bucket net each year?
[38]
Well, the first step is to determine
the average price each customer pays,
[43]
and then we can estimate the amount
of customers Mr. Plankton has annually.
[47]
In the season four episode, New Leaf,
[49]
Plankton reveals that,
up until this point,
[51]
he has only ever had one customer,
this dead rat.
[55]
A dead rat... OK...
[58]
In the episode, Plankton's Regular,
[61]
Plankton did have
a brief stint of success,
[63]
when regular customer Nat Peterson
frequented the Chum Bucket,
[66]
only to find that his computer wife,
[68]
was actually paying Nat
to eat at the Chum Bucket.
[71]
Seeing as Peterson eventually paid
the entire sum back,
[74]
it can be deduced that they broke even.
[76]
While the Chum Bucket has had
other bouts of popularity,
[79]
they seem to always end
with a catastrophe.
[82]
Resulting in repair bills
or even possible law suits.
[85]
Leading us to infer that
the Chum Bucket's annual profits are...
[88]
Fundamentally non-existent.
[90]
Er... OK, so an income of zero?
[94]
OK.
[95]
I have a few questions.
[97]
You keep mentioning episodes.
[100]
Is that how you measure your fiscal year?
[103]
Question two, what is the Chum Bucket's
cost of operations?
[107]
With a few short-lived exceptions,
[109]
Plankton doesn't have
any employees on the payroll,
[111]
and keeps the Chum Bucket open
from 8am to 6pm, Monday through Saturday,
[116]
while remaining closed on Sunday.
[118]
OK, great, well...
[120]
Since he's not generating any revenue,
[122]
it is very wise for Mr. Plankton
to implement this hiring freeze.
[126]
And also, being closed on Sunday
doesn't hurt either.
[129]
Now what are his utility costs like?
[131]
In general, a small restaurant would pay
about two dollars and ninety cents
[135]
per square foot for electricity,
[137]
and about 85 cent per square foot
for natural gas.
[139]
So I would just need to know
the square footage of the er...
[145]
Chum Bucket.
[148]
The season one episode, Sleepy Time,
[150]
reveals that SpongeBob
is four inches tall.
[153]
If we use SpongeBob as our ruler,
[155]
we learn that the diameter of the base
of the restaurant is 12 inches,
[159]
giving it a six inch radius.
[161]
So six inches?
[163]
Six inches?
[166]
OK.
[168]
Let's just plug that in.
[170]
Pi R-Squared.
[172]
And we have the area of the Chum Bucket,
which is 113... square... inches.
[180]
But that's not even a square foot!
[181]
That's a mistake, right?
[183]
If we assumed
Plankton owns the Chum Bucket outright,
[185]
then it doesn't cost him
much to maintain.
[188]
So if Plankton opened the Chum Bucket
as soon as he graduated college,
[191]
we can assume he has been paying
for these utilities for about 35 years.
[196]
Next, we have to look
at his personal expenses.
[198]
Since he lives in the Chum Bucket,
[200]
he doesn't have to pay any rent
or for additional property.
[203]
He also saves money by primarily eating
holographic food.
[208]
So what is he paying for?
[210]
We know he wears a single contact lens,
which don't come cheap.
[215]
An average box of six lenses
costs around 25 dollars.
[219]
So if Plankton changes his contact
every two weeks,
[222]
he would need almost five boxes a year.
[225]
He also owns a Labrador retriever.
[227]
This is my lab!
[231]
Which on average have an annual cost
of 2,268 dollars per year,
[237]
and judging by this particular dog's size
and the healthy condition of his teeth,
[241]
we can conclude
that he is about five years old.
[244]
Bringing the total cost to about
11,340 dollars.
[248]
And there is one major expense
we are forgetting.
[251]
I went to college!
[253]
The average debt for a student
of a four year college
[256]
is around 38, 390 dollars.
[259]
And since he has no source of income,
[260]
it's safe to say
he hasn't been paying off his loans.
[263]
So that means his loans have been
collecting interest for the past 35 years
[269]
which would bring his debt total to
[272]
211,759 dollars and 83 cents,
and he hasn't paid any of it off?
[280]
Finally, we have to calculate the cost
[282]
of Plankton's various schemes
and inventions.
[285]
we separated Plankton's
various inventions
[287]
into three tiers.
[289]
In the C tier, we have any small
technological gadgets and weapons,
[293]
like the Propeller Pen,
Stench Vision Goggles and Death Ray.
[297]
These likely cost close to the price
of an average, high-end smart phone.
[301]
We estimate he makes about five items
in this tier per year.
[305]
In the B tier, we have inventions
like The Analyzer,
[308]
The Ghost Extracting Machine
[309]
and the Switch-Lives-Just-To-Know-What-
It's-Like-O-Mogrifier.
[312]
We've determined that each of these
[314]
costs Plankton about the price
of a high-end gaming computer,
[317]
and he only makes
about three of these a year.
[320]
Finally, we have the A tier.
[322]
These are the highly functioning,
fully operational robots
[325]
that he frequently builds.
[327]
Robots like Robot Krabs, Robot SpongeBob
and Robot Game Show Host.
[332]
Each of these costs roughly around
the price of an average luxury car.
[336]
We've deduced that Plankton makes
about eight of these per year.
[340]
Meaning that ever year,
Plankton spends roughly
[342]
503,684 dollars and 97 cents
on inventions.
[348]
If we multiply that by 35 years,
[350]
and add in the rest
of the debt we calculated,
[352]
it comes to... 17, 856, 552 dollars
and 40 cents!
[360]
Mostly on this garbage,
I mean, who is this guy?
[364]
He knows I'm a financial advisor, right?
[367]
Not a magician!
[369]
What about this?
[371]
This wired, integrated, female
electroencephalograph?
[376]
Yes, what about that?
[378]
Karen is Plankton's
most complicated invention,
[380]
and also his beloved computer wife.
[383]
Karen is capable of advanced
human level communication,
[386]
leaning based decision making
and can even feel emotion.
[390]
As such, she is the world's first
and only known example
[393]
of artificial general intelligence.
[395]
Seeing as the United States has spent
millions in funds
[398]
towards developing
similar technologies to no avail,
[401]
we can conclude that Karen's software
cost millions, or even billions to--
[405]
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
[408]
I do not have time for this.
[410]
Oh no, now this is--
[411]
I mean, you people--
this is some kind of joke, right?
[415]
Bring him here, bring him here,
I wanna meet him!
[418]
We can't, ma'am.
[420]
What do you mean you can't?
[422]
He lives underwater... he's a plankton.
[427]
I'm outta here.
[432]
This is your office...
[434]
Our trust financial advisor agrees
that Plankton is in an ocean of debt.
[438]
We'll give her some time to process
and await her advice.
[441]
That's all for today, folks.
[443]
Let us know what you
want us to figure out
[445]
in the next episode of
Inside Bikini Bottom.
[449]
Goodbye, everyone,
I'll remember you all in therapy!
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