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Guy Who Can鈥檛 Stop Quoting Movies (feat. @Gus Johnson) - Addiction Busters - YouTube
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[1]
- Brad is the most
annoying guy in our office,
[3]
maybe the world.
[4]
We share a cubicle and
mornings are rough.
[8]
- Good mornin'.
[10]
And, in case I don't see ya,
[11]
good afternoon, good
evening and good night.
[18]
That was the...
- Truman Show, got it.
[22]
- Well, alrighty then.
[25]
(suspenseful music)
[31]
- The first time
Brad's dad messaged me
[33]
on Seeking Arrangements,
[34]
he told me his
son had a problem.
[36]
I assumed it was a drug problem,
[37]
but he said no, worse.
[40]
- I met Brad in a chat
room for Shrek fans.
[44]
I thought it was cool that he
knew every line from Shrek,
[46]
but then, a few weeks in,
[48]
I realized that he knew
every line from every movie.
[51]
- I can't live with
him another day
[52]
if I have to hear him
shout through the walls
[54]
"This is Sparta,"
before he cums.
[56]
- This is Sparta, oh.
[60]
- He masturbates
twice every morning.
[65]
(whispering)
[69]
- Here's Brad.
[71]
- Oh.
[72]
- Instead of Johnnie, so...
[74]
(laughs)
[75]
- Taylor, Taylor,
why so serious?
[79]
- Oh, God (beep).
[81]
- This is an intervention
because your entire personality
[84]
is quoting movies and it's
pissing everybody off.
[87]
- It's a trap.
[89]
- Son, are you ashamed
of your personality?
[93]
- No.
[95]
It's Christopher Walken,
Catch Me If You Can.
[96]
- Yeah, I got it.
[97]
- You're quoting Christopher
Walken saying no.
[103]
- Yes.
[104]
- Oh, my gosh.
[105]
- Anyway, I have a
speech I wanna read.
[109]
Brad, we've shared an office
space for three years...
[112]
- Excuse me, I believe
- I don't have your stapler.
[114]
And that's 1,000 times
you've quoted Office Space.
[117]
- You set me up.
[119]
- Even there, I can tell
you're quoting a movie,
[121]
even though I don't
know which one it is.
[123]
I can't, I just, I can't,
I can't, I'm sorry.
[127]
- Okay, I can tell what
you're all thinking.
[129]
Why, oh, why didn't
I take the blue pill?
[132]
- No.
[134]
No.
[135]
- Okay, Brad, I obviously
love your dedication to film,
[142]
but I've never seen
you be yourself.
[145]
- So, it's not gonna be easy.
[147]
It's gonna be really hard.
[149]
And, we're gonna have to
work at this every day,
[152]
but I want to do that.
[153]
- If you don't stop, we
can't date anymore, okay?
[158]
- He's quoting The
Notebook, yeah.
[161]
- I hate that movie.
[161]
- Why are you dating this guy.
[163]
- 'Cause dating in New
York is impossible.
[166]
- That's why you gotta
get a sugar daddy.
[168]
- That's gross, that's...
[169]
- Ah, clever girl.
[171]
- God, shut up.
[173]
Do you wanna know why no
one comes to our apartment?
[175]
It's because they can't
have a (beep) conversation
[177]
without you quoting a movie.
[180]
- You're tearing me apart, Lisa.
[183]
- What she's saying, son,
[186]
is just because we
have chiseled abs
[189]
and stunning
features doesn't mean
[192]
that we can't not die in a
freak gasoline fight accident.
[200]
- I wish I knew how to quit you.
[204]
- Not like this, not like this.
[210]
- I am Groot.
[212]
- I have nipples, Focker.
[214]
Can you milk me?
[217]
- It's like lookin' in a mirror.
[220]
Only, not.
[222]
- Leeloo Dallas multipass.
[227]
- Show me the money.
[229]
- There's no cryin' in baseball.
[234]
- You guys are right. I'm
so sorry. I'm pathetic.
[236]
(collective sigh)
[237]
- That's great.
[239]
You know, Brad, I
actually, I collected
[240]
all your DVD's and we're
gonna take you somewhere
[243]
and they're gonna help you.
[243]
- Thank you so much.
[245]
I'm sorry about all
this stupid nonsense.
[248]
I'm really
embarrassed right now.
[250]
Can I just say one more thing?
[253]
Frankly, my dear, I
don't give a damn.
[258]
- God.
[259]
There he goes.
[260]
Ahhhh
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