Guy Who Can鈥檛 Stop Quoting Movies (feat. @Gus Johnson) - Addiction Busters - YouTube

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[1]
- Brad is the most annoying guy in our office,
[3]
maybe the world.
[4]
We share a cubicle and mornings are rough.
[8]
- Good mornin'.
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And, in case I don't see ya,
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good afternoon, good evening and good night.
[18]
That was the... - Truman Show, got it.
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- Well, alrighty then.
[25]
(suspenseful music)
[31]
- The first time Brad's dad messaged me
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on Seeking Arrangements,
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he told me his son had a problem.
[36]
I assumed it was a drug problem,
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but he said no, worse.
[40]
- I met Brad in a chat room for Shrek fans.
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I thought it was cool that he knew every line from Shrek,
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but then, a few weeks in,
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I realized that he knew every line from every movie.
[51]
- I can't live with him another day
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if I have to hear him shout through the walls
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"This is Sparta," before he cums.
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- This is Sparta, oh.
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- He masturbates twice every morning.
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(whispering)
[69]
- Here's Brad.
[71]
- Oh.
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- Instead of Johnnie, so...
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(laughs)
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- Taylor, Taylor, why so serious?
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- Oh, God (beep).
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- This is an intervention because your entire personality
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is quoting movies and it's pissing everybody off.
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- It's a trap.
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- Son, are you ashamed of your personality?
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- No.
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It's Christopher Walken, Catch Me If You Can.
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- Yeah, I got it.
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- You're quoting Christopher Walken saying no.
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- Yes.
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- Oh, my gosh.
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- Anyway, I have a speech I wanna read.
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Brad, we've shared an office space for three years...
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- Excuse me, I believe - I don't have your stapler.
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And that's 1,000 times you've quoted Office Space.
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- You set me up.
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- Even there, I can tell you're quoting a movie,
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even though I don't know which one it is.
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I can't, I just, I can't, I can't, I'm sorry.
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- Okay, I can tell what you're all thinking.
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Why, oh, why didn't I take the blue pill?
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- No.
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No.
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- Okay, Brad, I obviously love your dedication to film,
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but I've never seen you be yourself.
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- So, it's not gonna be easy.
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It's gonna be really hard.
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And, we're gonna have to work at this every day,
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but I want to do that.
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- If you don't stop, we can't date anymore, okay?
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- He's quoting The Notebook, yeah.
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- I hate that movie.
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- Why are you dating this guy.
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- 'Cause dating in New York is impossible.
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- That's why you gotta get a sugar daddy.
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- That's gross, that's...
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- Ah, clever girl.
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- God, shut up.
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Do you wanna know why no one comes to our apartment?
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It's because they can't have a (beep) conversation
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without you quoting a movie.
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- You're tearing me apart, Lisa.
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- What she's saying, son,
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is just because we have chiseled abs
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and stunning features doesn't mean
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that we can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.
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- I wish I knew how to quit you.
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- Not like this, not like this.
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- I am Groot.
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- I have nipples, Focker.
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Can you milk me?
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- It's like lookin' in a mirror.
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Only, not.
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- Leeloo Dallas multipass.
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- Show me the money.
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- There's no cryin' in baseball.
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- You guys are right. I'm so sorry. I'm pathetic.
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(collective sigh)
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- That's great.
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You know, Brad, I actually, I collected
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all your DVD's and we're gonna take you somewhere
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and they're gonna help you.
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- Thank you so much.
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I'm sorry about all this stupid nonsense.
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I'm really embarrassed right now.
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Can I just say one more thing?
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Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
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- God.
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There he goes.
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Ahhhh