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Alexander Hamilton’s Salacious Sex Scandal (feat. Lin-Manuel Miranda) - Drunk History - YouTube
Channel: unknown
[1]
Pretty drunk.
[laughs]
[4]
- You feel okay?
[5]
- I'm giggly and there's gaps
in my memory. [laughs]
[8]
- That's all right.
- Already.
[10]
- Okay, so, uh,
let's get back.
[12]
- So, Yorktown.
[13]
<i> We won!</i>
[15]
<i> Well, now we've gotta
form a country.</i>
[17]
Um, they all ask him,
[19]
hey, come be a part of
the Constitutional Convention.
[21]
<i> So we're figuring out how</i>
[23]
<i> the American system
is gonna work.</i>
[25]
<i> The Constitutional Convention:</i>
[26]
<i> this is the room
where they're deciding</i>
[28]
<i> what the shape of our
government should be.</i>
[30]
<i> They're hashing it out.</i>
[32]
<i> And Hamilton speaks
for six hours.</i>
[34]
<i> But some of the things he
pitched would haunt him</i>
[38]
<i> the rest of his career.</i>
[39]
He pitched
maybe president for life?
[42]
<i> [whispering] Ooh, he's secretly
a monarchist.</i>
[45]
<i> Maybe, uh, we inherit...</i>
[49]
<i> positions.</i>
[51]
<i> [whispering]
Bullshit. That's terrible.</i>
[52]
<i> This guy just wants
to bring back the British.</i>
[55]
Those whispers are from
the perspectives
[56]
of, um, people who
don't like him.
[59]
<i> Um, but anyway, um, we adopt
the system that we adopt.</i>
[62]
<i> And Hamilton becomes
its most ardent defender.</i>
[68]
So--
[70]
Trying to find the straightest
line through this story.
[78]
So Hamilton has an affair.
[81]
<i> Um, while he's
the treasury secretary,</i>
[83]
<i> he carries on this affair with
a woman named Maria Reynolds.</i>
[87]
<i> Her husband shows up.</i>
[90]
<i> He's like, yo, uh,
that's my wife.</i>
[93]
<i> I'm happy to, like,
keep it on the low,</i>
[96]
<i> but you have to pay me.</i>
[99]
<i> Gets basically extorted
for about $1,000.</i>
[104]
James Reynolds, the husband
who was extorting him,
[107]
gets arrested on some
other bullshit.
[110]
<i> While he's trying to
weasel his way out of it,</i>
[112]
<i> he says, I've got dirt
on Alexander Hamilton.</i>
[115]
<i> Everyone goes,
really?</i>
[118]
<i> Hamilton, uh, and--
has been embezzling.</i>
[121]
And he sort of says
all this shit about Hamilton.
[124]
<i> Um, and so three guys
go to confront Hamilton</i>
[128]
<i> on these charges.</i>
[129]
<i> One of the dudes was future
president James Monroe.</i>
[133]
<i> And they went, yo, Hamilton,</i>
[135]
<i> we know what you did,
you know what you did.</i>
[138]
<i> Check out these checks
to James Reynolds.</i>
[140]
<i> What's up?
And they accuse him</i>
[142]
<i> of embezzling funds.</i>
[143]
<i> And Hamilton goes,
no, no, no.</i>
[145]
<i> I was just [bleep] this lady,</i>
[147]
<i> and her husband
was hitting me up for money.</i>
[149]
<i> I didn't touch American money,</i>
[151]
<i> and I have all kinds of proof.</i>
[153]
And he, like, vomits information
all over them.
[157]
<i> Oh, wow, that was more
than we needed to hear.</i>
[160]
<i> And we're good, thanks.</i>
[163]
<i> The info about the affair
gets somehow miraculously</i>
[166]
<i> printed in the paper.</i>
[168]
<i> Hamilton is not a great dude.</i>
[172]
<i> I know you think he's great
'cause he's a war vet,</i>
[174]
<i> and he's
the Treasury Secretary,</i>
[176]
<i> but you're gonna learn the
truth real soon.</i>
[180]
<i> And Hamilton gets this
and he goes to James Monroe,</i>
[185]
<i> [whispering]
what the [bleep]?</i>
[186]
<i> Like, I told you that in
secret.</i>
[187]
<i> And James Monroe's like,</i>
[189]
<i> it wasn't secret
and it wasn't me.</i>
[191]
<i> Wasn't me who--who, uh,
published it.</i>
[193]
<i> Mother[bleep]!</i>
[195]
<i> I told three people
about this</i>
[197]
<i> and you're the one
who was taking notes,</i>
[199]
<i> so I know it came from you.</i>
[201]
<i> Like...fess up.</i>
[204]
<i> [bleep] you.
[bleep] you.</i>
[205]
So Hamilton, over sharer,
writes the Reynolds Pamphlet.
[209]
The whole thing reads like
a Dear Penthouse letter.
[210]
Like, dear America,
[213]
<i> I never thought this would
happen to me.</i>
[215]
<i> But one day,
this ripped bodice woman</i>
[219]
<i> showed up at my door,
saying,</i>
[222]
<i> oh, my husband's beating me,
left me alone</i>
[224]
<i> and I need money
and I need help.</i>
[226]
<i> You are a man of honor.
Can you help me?</i>
[229]
<i> Hamilton's like,
I could give her money</i>
[231]
<i> or I could [bleep] her</i>
[232]
<i> and either one would be
acceptable.</i>
[234]
<i> The--the Reynolds Pamphlet
is like Dick 101.</i>
[237]
And, by the way,
he sent this to his friends.
[239]
<i> Being like, hey,
I think I'm gonna publish this.</i>
[242]
<i> And everyone was like,</i>
[243]
<i> hey, bro, I don't think
this is a good idea</i>
[245]
<i> to publish this.</i>
[247]
<i> Like, maybe your wife
and your seven children</i>
[249]
<i> would not love it
if you published this.</i>
[251]
<i> And Hamilton's like,
well, I mean, like,</i>
[253]
<i> I got accused of embezzling.</i>
[254]
<i> And, like,
I can't let that stand.</i>
[256]
<i> Maybe the, like,
marital infidelity trumps that?</i>
[260]
<i> I know it doesn't
in your head,</i>
[261]
<i> but to everyone else
in the world it does.</i>
[265]
<i> Um, and he's like, no,
I can't let that shit stand.</i>
[268]
<i> And Hamilton goes back
to James Monroe</i>
[271]
<i> and--and now Hamilton's like,</i>
[272]
<i> well, it's all out in the open.</i>
[274]
<i> um, and if you still wanna
settle this,</i>
[275]
<i> because I know you're the one
who leaked it.</i>
[277]
<i> Um, Monroe's like,
well, I didn't leak it,</i>
[279]
<i> but if you wanna, like, fight,
like, let's do this.</i>
[283]
<i> And so they meet face to face.</i>
[285]
<i> And Monroe goes,
all right, you're mad at me</i>
[288]
<i> because of this,
this, and this.</i>
[289]
<i> And Hamilton goes,
let's start at the beginning.</i>
[291]
And lists, like, the first time
they met. [laughs]
[295]
He lists the details
of the entire meeting,
[297]
<i> as Monroe gets more and more
impatient.</i>
[299]
<i> Monroe's like, I know all this,
I know all this.</i>
[302]
<i> I know all this.</i>
[304]
<i> Hamilton's like,
you interrupted me.</i>
[307]
<i> I have to start again.</i>
[308]
<i> And Monroe's getting
angrier and angrier,</i>
[310]
until they're finally
pulled apart.
[311]
'Cause they're about to, like,
punch each other in the face.
[314]
<i> So Monroe goes to his homey,
Aaron Burr.</i>
[317]
<i> And goes, yo,
you know Hamilton,</i>
[319]
<i> will you tell him--</i>
[321]
this is so, like,
high school gossip.
[324]
<i> He goes,
will you tell Hamilton</i>
[326]
<i> that if he's challenging me
to a duel, I accept.</i>
[330]
<i> But if he's not, I wasn't
challenging him to a duel.</i>
[334]
<i> And Burr goes
over to Hamilton, like,</i>
[337]
<i> James Monroe told me
to tell you</i>
[340]
<i> that if you're challenging him,
he accepts,</i>
[342]
<i> but if you weren't
challenging him,</i>
[343]
<i> he doesn't really
wanna go into a duel.</i>
[346]
Uh, and Burr
squashes the duel.
[348]
<i> Burr's like,
duels are stupid.</i>
[351]
<i> And you both should just,
like shut up.</i>
[354]
<i> And it's over.</i>
[356]
<i> And Hamilton told everyone
everything, anyway.</i>
[358]
<i> So there's no point in
you shooting at each other.</i>
[360]
<i> [cell phone beeps]
Sorry, I forgot</i>
[361]
<i> to put my phone on vibrate.</i>
[362]
<i> - Yeah, okay.</i>
[364]
<i> - Uh-oh, Questlove's--</i>
- Questlove?
[366]
- Texting me.
[367]
"You did 'Drunk History'?"
[369]
What? How did Questlove
find out?
[370]
- Oh, here we go.
[372]
<i> - Yo!</i>
- Questlove!
[374]
<i> - Yo! [laughs]</i>
[376]
<i> [both laugh]</i>
[378]
- Look at this.<i>
- This is the best shit ever!</i>
[381]
<i> I cannot wait
for this episode.</i>
[383]
<i> My girl and I got together
based on our love</i>
[385]
<i> for "Drunk History."</i>
[386]
- You see the effect you have?
- Well--
[388]
I love you both.
[389]
- ♪ History has its eyes
on you ♪
[392]
- Yes.<i>
- This is awesome!</i>
[394]
<i> - Cheers.
- Bye, Questo.</i>
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